Lady and Gentlemen take your seatbelts off and be ready for an adventure of hilariousness! "Cocaine Bear" is an awesome ride, in more ways than one. This movie is based on a "bear-y" true story and transforms it into an comical horror movie that will cause you to laugh, scratching the inside of your skull, and asking questions about your choices in life, both bears and drug smugglers.
Cocaine Bear
From the moment we get to meet the beautiful Andrew C Thornton, played wonderfully by Matthew Rhys, you know the audience is in for a wild journey. The smuggler has style elegant grace, as well as a knack for dumping his precious cargo in the most unlikely areas. He didn't realize of the possibility that he could unwittingly create the legend of the century "Cocaine Bear!"
Forget what think you know about bears, and their eating habits. The movie takes an obscene approach and suggests that when bears drink cocaine, the don't just party, they turn into bloodthirsty monsters! Move over, Godzilla, there's a new queen in town. And it's a bear that has a habit of consuming powdered substances.
Our cast of characters, which includes the inept police officers on the run, the negligent criminals and innocent pedestrians who had trouble finding their way through a bag of paper can keep you amused. Their collective incompetence truly is an amazing sight. If you ever find yourself in need of a laugh then just think about Detective Bob Springs and Officer Reba Mitchell working together to investigate some crime and not accidentally shooting each other.
We must not forget our brave adventurers, Olaf and Elsa. They're not from the movie taken from "Frozen." The two hikers come across an incredible treasure trove of Colombian goodies, and prior to when one can even hear "Bearzilla," they become people who will be targets of Cocaine Bear's ever-growing hunger. What's the point of an Disney (blog post) princess when there's hissing, running bear at large?
The film strikes the perfect mix of humor and terror that makes you laugh when you laugh and then grip that popcorn to hide in terror the next. The bodies count increases faster as the hairs in your neck as you'll cheer every death scene with an eerie excitement. This is similar to watching a National Geographic special hosted by Grim Reaper. Grim Reaper.
Let's discuss the ultimate showdown. Imagine this: a torrent of water over the backdrop, our fearless family composed of Sari, Dee Dee, and Henry ready to take on the Cocaine Bear. This is a battle of the ages, complete with explosives, roars from the bear, and enough white powder to take Tony Montana to shame. When you think that bear's done and gone, there's an explosive cocaine explosion! It's a resurgence of famous proportions.
Sure "Cocaine Bear" may have imperfections. The editing is just as quick as a caffeinated squirrel leading you to scratch your head and asking yourself if that film reel could have been used for scratching posts. But fear not, dear viewers, for the bear CGI looks amazing. The bear is the star of the show and the editing team seemed to appear to be in the midst of a sugar rush their own.
The film is a mix that combines tension, double-crossings in addition to unexpected bonds. It's like mixing tequila with bear saliva--unconventional and unforgettable. After the credits have rolled before you depart the theater smiling at your face, just remember his final warning to the audience: Don't feed bears anything, especially not heroin or fellow trekkers. Don't be fooled, it's not going to take a lot of time for anyone who is involved.
Get your popcorn, buckle down, as you take on the wild world of "Cocaine Bear." This is a unique cinematic experience which will have you in suspense, considering the potential of bears as well as their undiscovered party possibilities.